So I'm a bit freaked out at the moment.
While I haven't posted much lately here on my blog I still manage to read everyone else's blogs EVERY DAY. So I sat down with my Computer where I promptly opened up Google Reader to see what everyone has been up to. I began reading and my jaw literally hit the floor.
This blog went on to discuss a Parenting Webinar coming up later in May called: Parenting from the Trenches . It is for Parents dealing with Attachment Disorder. No big deal really. I've learned a lot about Attachment Disorder in our Foster Parenting classes so I basically just skimmed over the post ready to move on to something new and more interesting.
But the sentence... "Do you have a child who lies, steals, sneaks, stalks, hordes, chatters non-stop, or urinates in places other than the potty, etc?" ...brought me straight back to reality in a flash.
Could my Princess be suffering from Attachment Disorder?
She has every.single.one. of those behaviors.
Attachment Disorder isn't all that unusual for kids that are Adopted later on in life or those that spent their first few years in another Country. Not necessarily with those that are brought home straight from the Hospital. I know the thought of Attachment Disorder has run across my mind several times over the last year as her behavior escalated, but every time it came up I managed to stuff it down into my "denial" box and told myself that it simply wasn't possible.
That sentence there above describes my child. Plain and simple. My wonderful, beautiful Princess. So how did it happen?? WHEN? WHY???? and WHAT THE HECK AM I SUPPOSED TO DO ABOUT IT!!!!!
I thought we did everything right in those first few crucial years. We parented her just as we did with our boys - heck we probably did more! She was doted on hand and foot. After all, she truly was our little Princess.
When she was a newborn she overstimulated easily from noises, movement, lights and eye contact, All thanks to drug exposure in utero. I often sat in the nursery with her and just held her tight. She would be swaddled up like a little burrito and I was careful to not rock her or look her in the eyes. She would have been happy to just lay in the crib alone in the dark, quiet room but we simply couldn't bear to leave her there so we would take turns sitting with her in complete silence. We did this for weeks while her little body learned to adjust to sensory imput. Gradually she learned to function outside of the dark quiet nursery but she seemed to be developing very slowly.
At her well baby checkup the red flags went up and alarm bells began going off. She was 4 months old and yet had the milestones of a 2 week old. She couldn't lift her head up off the floor and move it from one side to the other. She still didn't make very much eye contact. She certainly didn't smile yet- let alone laugh or giggle. It was bad. Very bad. We were told at that point that the drug exposure was probably not to blame. Delays like this are caused by Alcohol exposure. It was very possible that she may have Fetal Alcohol Syndrome. I cried the entire way home and for days afterwords. Her therapies were increased and some added. She was in OT, PT and Speech several times a week throughout her first year. Slowly but surely she came out of her shell. She is now at or above age level in nearly every area. It took a lot of work, determination and love.
...so HOW IN THE HECK could she have managed to get Attachment Disorder?
*sigh* I think I need to attend that Webinar because I just don't get it.
The past few weeks have been nothing but haze. As I sit and try and update this I honestly have a hard time picking and choosing what the write about.
Princess has been more difficult than ever. Just when I think we're going to have a breakthrough and she will realize that she's 4 now and should stop the crazy behavior, she does something else. I swear some of the things she does are things we've learned about in our Foster Parenting classes that are classic of abused and neglected kids. (Her latest antics are urinating on the floor behind her bed and she's escalated the stealing and hiding that she's done since very early on, before we even considered it "stealing") Yet she was never abused or neglected!! We got her straight from the Hospital. It makes me wonder how much genetics really plays in each of us.
I've been thinking a lot about the comments said on the stand during the trail before the Adoption was finalized. At the advice our our attorney we hired this Psychologist who came in and observed our family interactions with Princess. She did an independent bonding assesment to present to the court. This woman had studied and written books on Bonding and Attachment and was an expert in the field. Did you know Bonding and Attatchment are 2 very different things? I didn't, that is until we listened to her speak that day on the stand. She talked about how even newborns suffer loss when separated from their Biological Mothers. Some more than others, but it was well documented and it didn't matter how good of a home that the child went too. So is this something that Princess suffered? Is the reason she has such strange behaviors now?
I admit, that really seems like a stretch. After all, she's 4 yrs old now! Seems she would have gotten past that by now.
In the meantime, the two of us continue to butt heads. I try and be as consistent as possible with her. In the past, this was very difficult because hubby had the mentality that she was his perfect princess and let her get away with everything- but now even he is frustrated with her.
Yesterday was just awful. She awoke in a bad mood and I knew it was going to be a bad day. We ended up going shopping for new shoes for the boys. She was sitting in the cart fussing because I wouldn't let her stand up in the cart. (Imagine that!? I'm such a mean terrible mom hu?) Unfortunately, she cannot be trusted to walk and must be in the cart. Anyway, she reached up and slapped me across the face for no apparent reason. It completely took me by surprise and I reacted. That was just the beginning of our difficult day. Just an hour later I had to take her kicking and screaming away from her Soccer Game because she was acting up and I verbally told her if she wouldn't stop then we were leaving. Of course, I had to follow through- so off we went. The boys and I had the pleasure of listening to her scream miserably the whole way home.
The afternoon didn't improve much. I tried taking her outside while I worked in the yard but she wouldn't stay nearby and kept wandering off. We don't have a fence and back to an open space filled with trees and a pond. We had a Coyote appear in our backyard just last week wanting to feast on our new puppy. I just can't have her wandering off like that!! After 2 warnings I had to take her inside to her room. We are very consistent- yet she STILL DOESN'T LEARN!?!?!?
I'm spent. I'm frustrated and questioning things I never imagined I'd be questioning. I need to post more because I feel so much better when I do....
I was recently made aware that Princess's birth mom is doing extremely well. I've been told she is clean and holding down a job! It's wonderful news!
You see, we were told during our Foster Parent classes that only 1 in 10 Meth addicts can ever become free from the addiction. Meth is probably the hardest drug addiction to overcome...even harder than Cocaine.
Princess has 3 biological siblings. Their birth mother isn't parenting any of them. She was never able to stay with any programs offered by Human Services long enough to help get any of her children back. She was in and out of jail, and many different rehabs.
When Princess was a newborn, I sat with the birth mom each week before her supervised visits began and listened to her talk about how much she loved all of her children. I watched as she cradled her newborn daughter, and cried. She would sit with Princess on her chest, just taking in the smell of the top her head. There was no doubt in my mind this woman loved her children with every bone in her body. -Yet the very next week she wouldn't show up for her visit. I always suspected when a visit was missed it was thanks to some kind of substance that had come in between visiting her child. She and Birth-Dad missed so many visits, they were finally canceled altogether.
At the time, I really didn't hold out much hope that she would ever come clean. In my mind, there's no bigger goal than to reunite with your children. I guess the addiction was just too strong.
Anyway, while I am very glad to have this beautiful child to call my own now, my heart still (and probably always will) aches sometimes because she could not be with her biological mommy. I guess it's because I was able to see how much this woman truly loved her. She just wasn't able to overcome the addiction in time.
While the news of her doing so well is great to hear, we have to keep in mind she's not yet in the clear. I've read that the addiction to Meth is so strong, one must be clean 2-3 years before you're out of the woods!
I hope and pray Princess's birth mom is able to remain drug free. You never know, someday her daughter may want to seek her out. If that day comes, I want Princess to meet the woman I know her birth mom must be inside.... The one I saw briefly that carressed and cried for her daughter. The one that love was eminating from. Not a homeless drug addict. I don't want my child to ever see that side to her birth mom.
My fingers are crossed.
I've been awarded my very first award!! It came from Dorsey over at Searching For My Inner Skinny.
Here are the rules...
1. Put the award up on your blog
2. Add a link to the person who awarded it to you
3. Nominate at least seven other blogs
4. Add links to these blogs on your blog
5. Leave a message for your nominee on their blog
So, as with so many other awards, I need to share the love. Since Adoption Day is in November and it's right around the corner, I think I'll give this award to some of my fellow Adoption bloggers...
In no particular order:
Born in our Hearts - She's adopted 2 beautiful little girls. One was through a disrupted International Russion Adoption, and the other a Domestic Adoption.
Cookie Crumbs and Bit Bits - Tamara and her husband have completed 2 Foster Care Adoptions!
From Yuppies to Parents in just 8 months- This couple is going to be adopting privately from a family member. Their story is a new one and I look forward to reading more about their journey.
Keeping afloat most days- Brenda adopted through the Foster Care system like we did, and her son is about the same age as Princess!
Through the eyes of an Adoptive family in waiting This family was JUST MATCHED for an Open Adoption! I am SO excited for them! The baby is due Dec. 28th. All my fingers and toes are crossed.
My Life A newbie on the block! They are hoping to adopt from the Foster Care system. They're currently finishing up classes and I look forward to reading about their journey as they get their feet wet. :-D
You could always adopt Dream Mommy has adopted a handsome little boy from the Foster Care system and continues to be foster in hopes that they may adopt again.
I've hummed and hawwwed over whether to post this here on my blog. There are people who read here that will not understand. However, there are many that read here... that just might. It is those people that I want to hear comments from. Please don't judge me, for those of you that can't help yourself, don't bother! I wont post them.
I am near my breaking point. Life stressors have changed. Now instead of worrying about how we're going to pay our mortgage every month ( hubby injured his Shoulder at work and was out of commission for several months) he's working 2 FT jobs and we're quickly catching up. We'll soon be ahead and just in time for Christmas. I should be celebrating. I should be jumping for joy. Instead I no longer have ANY support here at home day or night and I'm literally ready to run away. Abandon my 4 children and disappear into another life. Of course, that will never happen, but I'd be lying if I said the thought hadn't seriously crossed my mind.
I'm majorly sleep deprived thanks to Princess. The child DOES NOT SLEEP. She keeps me running after her the entire day, a nap is a rare occurrence and now having her keep me up all night too is breaking me. I dread each morning and what the new day will bring. I seriously need respite care. Funny how that's one thing I would have never imagined asking for in our Adoption subsidy. We've had her since she was 2 days old. Raised her as our own from the very beginning- yet I have to admit she is so very different. She's programmed different and nothing we have done could have changed that. Had she been older, we certainly would have asked for something like Respite to keep our sanity, but we never thought we'd need it.
I'm not sure why, but I have had recent feelings of... well... I don't even know what to call them kind of feelings. They come from pure frustration, probably exhaustion too. I just feel like I'm failing her. We've been through the PCIT therapy. We've been consistent. We've done everything we know what to do. It's not normal for a 3 yr old to sleep 2-3 hours in a 24hr period consistantly. NOT NORMAL!!! It's also not normal for a 3yr old child to have some kind of need to constantly be getting into things. Day or night, she's getting into things she's not supposed too. She's like a 1 yr old in that regard. 1 y/o's don't really know better...nearly 4y/o's DO! Yet she can't. She lacks the impulse control.
Recently Princess had another bad night. She was literally up and down all night long. I fought her most of the night, but at some point after 4:30am I fell into a deep, dead sleep and didn't wake up until 6:15 when I usually get up. Wanna know what I found?
Yeah, let's see... her bedroom floor covered with a big mess of red "something" all over her carpet. Upon further inspection under her bed (where she puts things she's knows she's not supposed to have) this is what I found:
1 empty ziplock bag
1 empty playdoh container (white playdoh that had been stored in the said Ziplock bag)
1 pair of very sharp kitchen scissors
1 empty box of Cherry Jello mix
1 plastic knife (THANK GOD it was plastic!)
OMG This is never coming out of our brand new carpet. THANK GOODNESS she didn't hurt herself with the scissors or cut off all her hair!! What if next time, it's not a Plastic knife, but a REAL one???
We've tried everything.
*Baby gates don't work. She climbs them or knocks them down.
*Co-sleeping. She waits until we're sleeping and climbs out of bed to get into anything she can.
*We've tried locking her door from the outside. It makes it worse. I'm forced to sit through hours of screaming. I mean HOURS upon HOURS of screaming. It just can't be good for her emotionally.
*I've taken her to the Doctor. He can't find anything physically wrong with her and feels it must be Psychological/Behavioral and she may need some kind of therapy. Someone please tell me, how can a 3y/o benefit from therapy??
ACK, this post is going to turn into a novel if I keep this up. To make a long story short, I think I am beginning to resent my beautiful little Princess. I'm finding that I actually need to get away from her. A question for fellow Adoptive families.... Am I suffering from "Post-Adoption Depression Syndrome" (PADS)? I've seen the term thrown around before, but we're nearly 1 year post finalization here. Plus we Adopted here in the United States, not abroad and we've had her since she was 2 days old. Do you think it's still possible? Could it even set in this late in the game??
GAH- On the other hand, maybe I just need sleep.
My head is pounding. After walking on air for the last few days (excitment over the Adoption date) I was suddenly brought back down to reality.
NJ's Neurosurgeon in Chicago requested we have a Swallow Study done before our appointment next month. So I put a call into our pediatrician here in Oklahoma City and told them what needed to be done. (I told them he needed a "SWALLOW STUDY" just as it was worded to me) I also made sure they have the name and number of the specialist in Chicago in case there were any questions.
His "Swallow Study" was scheduled for today. As I checked in, they verify with me that we're getting a "Barium Swallow"? Ummm?? I guess?? I tell them, we're getting a Swallow Study done. No one questioned me, so I assumed that Barrium Swallow is a different name for a Swallow Study.
Well, I was wrong. After the procedure was completed, the Pysicians Assistant tells me he swallowed the liquid just fine, no problems.
Liquid? Ummm... he doesn't choke on liquid. Just foods.
The PA then says there is another test, a Dysphagiagram that looks at the chewing and swallowing of foods and textures.
OMG, so I just payed for a very expensive procedure that we didn't need!?!? Somewhere in the communication between Neurosurgeon, Pediatrician and Hospital, someone screwed up. I'm not familiar with the Medical Name for these tests. How am I supposed to catch on to something like this?
I'm mad!
Our official ADOPTION DATE!!!!!!!!! Yes, in just one week she will be officially, 100%, legally OUR DAUGHTER. We are ecstatic!
I haven't heard a word from the Adoption Worker since last week. She told me by Monday we'd have a date. Here it is Thursday and still, not a word. So what's the hold up?? I want to call them so badly and ask! I just can't bring myself to pick up the phone. I feel like all we do is nag, bitch and complain. We are so close, I just can't figure out what the hold up could be.
I just want them to tell me a date. Confirm it for us. We need to begin planning. We'd like to have a big Adoption Party. Then again, maybe we'll just have an expanded Birthday Party? (Her birthday is later in Feb.) I wouldn't feel right having 2 big parties within weeks of each other. We need a date so we can decide if we'll be finalizing the Adoption over the phone (as long as the Judge approves it which is still up in the air) or if our large family will have to travel to Denver. The logistics of that, when/where/how long we'll stay etc etc etc....
I'm going crazy here. I just need a DATE darnit!!!!!
So call me impatient. I really am! I'll be the first one to admit it. (My husband is nodding his head furiously)
I couldn't just sit around any more. Not since I know how close we are. I didn't want our case to fall through any more cracks. So this afternoon I picked up the phone on a whim and called our Adoption Worker. She answered the phone right away and told me she had filed the paperwork TODAY at the Courthouse. She said typically she will hear back regarding a court date within the same day, but it's possible that the Clerk and/or Judge are still out on Holiday and we should hear something by Monday.
Worst case scenario? Our Adoption date will be Feb. 5th. She said there is a Permanency Planning set up for that day already and they may just do it then. She's hoping that's not the case and we'll get in sooner.
Heck, after all this time, I'm good with Feb. 5th!! If it comes sooner than that, WONDERFUL.
It's almost surreal. We're actually going to finalize this Adoption!
I read an article on Yahoo yesterday that made me burn inside.
Can an Adopted Child be returned?
As the day progressed, the fire inside me grew bigger and bigger. It's Adoptive parents such as these that give Adoptive parents all over the world a bad name. What they did was inexcusable. It's straight and simple... they abandoned their 8 year old daughter. In essence, returning her like a gallon of spoiled milk.
I understand from the Article that she probably suffered from Attachment Disorder. I acknowledge Attachment Disorder is often very difficult to work with, it is probably the single biggest cause of disrupted Adoptions here in the United States.
So what's my problem? Well, this child was Adopted at the age of 4 months. The family "claims" she never adapted to their culture, food or home. WTH??? Come on!!!! She was a tiny little baby. I don't believe that EXCUSE for one minute. 4 month olds will eat what you give them. If there were signs of Attachment Disorder, I want to know what they did to overcome it!?
When you have a biological child that gets into trouble, that becomes difficult... do parents just throw up their hands and give them back?? NO!!!!! So what's the difference? Once Adopted, the child becomes YOUR CHILD. There is no turning back, there is no changing your mind.
I wish there was someway to prevent this from happening. It's just not fair to the children.
We've been talking about what to do for 'The Princess' in honor of her Adoption Day. I've been browsing the Internet and found there are many online stores that offer a multitude of choices. Pendants, Bracelets, Books, Stuffed Animals, clothing you name it!
We were thinking on her special day we'd take her to Build a bear.
We will let her choose her favorite stuffed animal and then as an *official* family, stuff it together! Making the bear *extra* special, I thought we might put a photo of her birth mom inside. Do you think that's a bad idea? I'm not sure why, but I seem to have such a strong feelings for her birth mom. I'm so thankful that she chose to give our little girl life. Sure she made many mistakes. I've gone through all of the emotions.. Trust me, the anger I've felt inside because of the things this woman did while she was pregnant.... but in the end, our daughter is bright and beautiful. She is alive. Her birth mother could have chosen abortion after all.
~Anyway, sorry I'm getting way deeper than I ever intended too when I started this post.~
We'll also be getting her ears pierced. Something I've wanted to do for sooooo long now. I joke with the hubby that they'll never know. We should just go ahead and do it now. It's not like the caseworkers would notice! But no, the hubby insists we wait. So we will, and it will be that much more special on Adoption Day.
Do you have any ideas for us? Did you give your child anything special on Adoption Day?
... well, I spoke too soon. Not long after submitting that last blog post I got a call from the Subsidy worker. Apparently, it was a good thing I had called her Supervisor. She tells me that she and her Supervisor had just finished a meeting and she had an offer to present to me. Right then and there! I listened carefully and quickly agreed to accept the terms they were offering us. I didn't even ask my husband. It's a full package though, just what we were hoping for!!! The meeting for late next week is cancelled and we are now *simply waiting for a court date*. We're FINALLY almost there. It's nearly over. Yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm told it will be a few weeks until they can squeeze us into court. I've also heard of people getting a court date for thier Foster-Adoption in just a few days. I guess we'll have to wait and see. Wouldn't that be a fantastic Christmas present!?
...No, I'm not talking about 'The Princess' throwing a tantrum. ME, I'M THROWING THE TANTRUM!!!
So, of course there has been yet another delay. I should come to expect it. We were to meet via teleconference with Denver to finalize our Adoption Subsidy Wednesday. After sitting by the phone for over an hour we realized that no one was going to call. So, we began calling them. Called the Subsidy worker, the Adoption worker, our regular Caseworker, the Caseworkers Supervisor.... not a single one would pick up the phone. (of course!) I am beyond pissed at this point.
Hours later when we finally got a hold of the Subsidy worker, I was told she had been sick. That we would need to reschedule the meeting. She was very short with me and I returned the attitude. I've never really done that before. I've always been afraid they are going to take my daughter away if I'm mean to them. Well, it's been nearly 3 years now, I'd like to see them try! No judge in his right mind would allow that to happen so I am strapping my balls on. (giggle... what a mental picture eh?)
Is it SO HARD to pick up the phone and make a call to say you won't be able to hold the meeting because of illness? We would have totally understood. Of course, we wouldn't have been happy about it, but these things do happen. People do get sick. It's the disrespect and inconsideration that this woman showed us by making us wait by the telephone for over an hour.
In the meantime, I have paperwork sitting on my counter for the courts. They are waiting to be signed and notarized. One of them, specifically says we've negotiated and finalized on the Subsidy. Earlier in the week, the Adoption worker told me to go ahead sign and mail it to her even though the Subsidy negotiations were not complete. It would help us to get a court date that much sooner. .....Um, excuse me? Do you think I am retarded? There is no way I am going to do that. That's just asking to be screwed over. Ugh, uh. No way!
Do you think it's just a coincidence that the Subsidy meeting was pushed back at the same time the Adoption worker told me to go ahead and sign paperwork saying we'd already finalized the Subsidy?
Hmmmm, I'm really starting to wonder...
It's been a wild week. At one point, it almost looked as if this trip back to Denver would not happen after all.
It seems that because my prints were rejected by the FBI due to smudging, once new prints are drawn up, Denver can resubmit them at no cost. (whoop-de-do!)
What does this mean for me? Well, it means they tried getting out of doing them digitally. Yep. Soon after scheduling the appointment I got a phone call from the Fingerprint office. The woman called because she received my prints in the mail. (The prints I had done and mailed right away before decided that we would indeed eat the cost of a plane ticket and go have them submitted digitally) I told her no, just throw them away. I am flying in later this week. We want to submit them digitally to save time. You know ahhhh 3-5 DAYS vs. 8-10 WEEKS!? She said okay and hung up. 10 minutes later she called back and told me they would not submit them digitally because they can have them redone for free.... blah blah blah.
I begged and pleaded with her, even offered to pay for it myself. I wouldn't want Denver to be out $30 extra bucks, especially after delaying our case for sooooo long. (rolleyes, I'm being sarcastic) I was told "That's not our procedure."
So I hung up the phone and I cried. And cried and cried.
The next day, my husband got on the phone and started making phone calls. He went high up the chain of command and in the end, my appointment has been reestablished. I will fly to Denver, I will have my prints taken and submitted digitally.
Oh the stress of this case!!!!!!!!
Keep your fingers crossed that I don't run into problems once I arrive in Denver.
Well, I've decided to just go.
I'll be flying to Denver later this week to submit my digital prints to be directly submitted to the FBI. Results are supposed to be returned in 3-5 days.
I had pretty much crossed off all other options, and not wanting to wait 2-3 more months, it was an easy decision to make. I feel a sense of relief that we still have a chance at finalizing things before the end of the year.
Wish me luck and pray we can get an Adoption Date for the end of December. Everything should be good to go by then! All my fingers (and toes!) are crossed.
I got a call yesterday from the woman assigned to handle our daughters Adoption Subsidy. She needs a copy of our tax return ASAP, which I will be mailing out today. I'm not really sure why that information is necessary, but I didn't ask questions. A conference call (meeting) is set up for Dec. 5th to discuss and agree on a Subsidy package. She will be calling us before that date with an "offer". Gee, it almost sounds like....buying a car or something. ?? Well whatever it is, it certainly doesn't seem right.
On a brighter note, she asked for our daughters new name and spelling! We've had that picked out for sometime now and have even started calling her by the new name. I don't know why, but telling her that information was sooooooooo exciting!!!!!!! It's almost real now. I think it's been so long since we got word we would be her Adoptive family, that it's just surreal. I hear that once the Adoption is finalized our Hearts will suddenly open completely... and I just can't imagine that! She already feels like our own child. I don't feel any differently toward her than I do my biological children, so I can't imagine a little piece of paper that makes it official is going to do anything different to my heart. We shall see. I did have a strange warm feeling, one that I had not felt before, as I tucked her into bed last night. Perhaps there IS some part that is closed off, protecting itself from hurt and pain that would come if she were to be removed from our family?? I guess only time will tell....
I finally have some time to sit down and update things.
....she does not have Cystic Fibrosis. Yay!!! We see the Pulminologist again soon for followup. I'm not sure what he's going to do now. All of the medication (for reflux) that he had us try proved worthless. The Dysphagiagram (to check for aspiration of liquids or solids when she eats) again came out normal. It's all wonderful news.... yet she continues to have frequent wheezing episodes. I hope he has a good Plan B. We shall see.
I contacted the caseworker in Denver to find out the status of the Adoption. She emailed me back and said that last time she spoke with her guy (whoever that is!) they were only waiting on our latest fingerprint cards to be returned from the State.
Hmm? That's odd, because I don't remember ever agreeing to a subsidy!? They can't file for a day in court without that being crossed of the agenda list. This is the sweetest caseworker, but sometimes I really do wonder.... because we're not actually *in* Denver (or even in Colorado for that matter) if she pushes our case to the back burner because it's so convenient. I mean, after all she doesn't have monthly home visits to remind her that we're sitting here anxiously awaiting the day our Daughter is OFFICIALLY ours.
I do have some more good news though. As we near the end of yet another year of waiting, my husband and I have begun to get a little nervous. You see,we have not done any of the required annual training hours in order to keep our Foster Care license. The LAST thing we want to do is take all of the initial training (27 hours here in Oklahoma) over again. We have to have a current Foster Care license in order for "The Princess" to remain in our care until her Adoption is finalized. Never in our wildest dreams did we ever imagine it wouldn't be finalized by the end of the year. The way the case is progressing though, now I'm not so sure. We may very well still be waiting come January.
Thinking about the possibility that we may have to scramble together 12 annual credit hours in just a few weeks was a little stressful to say the least.
Well, I got some paperwork in the mail from the Oklahoma caseworker yesterday. It was a report of any training we've done over the year and how many hours were still needed. Much to my surprise, instead of a big fat ZERO, it stated that we had:
27 hours, 2007
Apparently, because we didn't finish last year's class until January of 07 (due to Weather related cancellations of the class, several weeks in a row) they are counting all of those training hours for 07. Technically, I'm not sure they were supposed to do that, but I'm certainly not going to wave my arms around pointing it out to them. No way Jose. What a relief that is!
I'm not sure what has happened. For awhile there, so many things were going on all at once. We were getting paperwork in the mail and phone calls with different questions etc. every day. All revolving this Adoption. Then, for no apparent reason it all stopped. We got our Subsidy paperwork sent off and havent heard a peep since. I just don't know what to think!? I'm not worried about anything, it's just a bit weird to have the phone ringing off the hook with Adoption worker, Caseworker, Subsidy worker, ICPC coordinator etc etc etc all calling for you and then.... one day, just nothing!
I'm hoping everyone is just sitting tight awaiting for the newest test results. I imagine the subsidy we are to receive will hinge on the outcome of the testing she goes in for next week. A Dysphagiagram and a Sweat Test for Cystic Fibrosis. These tests were ordered by the Pulminologist due to her constant breathing difficulties.
She's already had a Dysphagiagram, when she was about a year old. She was having difficulty swallowing thin liquids and choked and gagged on them. She was just coming off specially thickened formula and onto whole milk. The Swallow Study was pretty normal, nothing too concerning at the time so I can't imagine the results being all that different this time around?
That leaves, Cystic Fibrosis. That's a scary thought when you're talking about your child! She does have a few of the symptoms, like frequent respiratory infections, wheezing and poor growth... but she doesn't have all of the symptoms that I have read about, so that is a good sign! We're keeping our fingers crossed that she just has really bad Asthma that we are having a hard time controlling.
I'll be sure to keep you all updated on how things progress...
We got word from Denver. They have been trying to get everything together so that we can finalize the Adoption on National Adoption Day (Nov. 17th) but it seems that they are waiting on 2 things.
1. Our annual fingerprints to be returned. They expect them by the first of November.
2. 2 of our personal references have not returned the reference letters. They've spoken with them personally and these people promise to have them returned in the next few days. (I have no idea which 2, or I'd be calling them and begging them right now!!!!!!)
So, they don't think they'll be ready to finalize by National Adoption Day, but rather on or around December 1st.
YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Can you tell I could care less about it being on National Adoption Day??)
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