It's been a wild week. At one point, it almost looked as if this trip back to Denver would not happen after all.

It seems that because my prints were rejected by the FBI due to smudging, once new prints are drawn up, Denver can resubmit them at no cost. (whoop-de-do!)

What does this mean for me? Well, it means they tried getting out of doing them digitally. Yep. Soon after scheduling the appointment I got a phone call from the Fingerprint office. The woman called because she received my prints in the mail. (The prints I had done and mailed right away before decided that we would indeed eat the cost of a plane ticket and go have them submitted digitally) I told her no, just throw them away. I am flying in later this week. We want to submit them digitally to save time. You know ahhhh 3-5 DAYS vs. 8-10 WEEKS!? She said okay and hung up. 10 minutes later she called back and told me they would not submit them digitally because they can have them redone for free.... blah blah blah.

I begged and pleaded with her, even offered to pay for it myself. I wouldn't want Denver to be out $30 extra bucks, especially after delaying our case for sooooo long. (rolleyes, I'm being sarcastic) I was told "That's not our procedure."

So I hung up the phone and I cried. And cried and cried.

The next day, my husband got on the phone and started making phone calls. He went high up the chain of command and in the end, my appointment has been reestablished. I will fly to Denver, I will have my prints taken and submitted digitally.

Oh the stress of this case!!!!!!!!

Keep your fingers crossed that I don't run into problems once I arrive in Denver.

Well, I've decided to just go.

I'll be flying to Denver later this week to submit my digital prints to be directly submitted to the FBI. Results are supposed to be returned in 3-5 days.

I had pretty much crossed off all other options, and not wanting to wait 2-3 more months, it was an easy decision to make. I feel a sense of relief that we still have a chance at finalizing things before the end of the year.

Wish me luck and pray we can get an Adoption Date for the end of December. Everything should be good to go by then! All my fingers (and toes!) are crossed.

I got a call yesterday from the woman assigned to handle our daughters Adoption Subsidy. She needs a copy of our tax return ASAP, which I will be mailing out today. I'm not really sure why that information is necessary, but I didn't ask questions. A conference call (meeting) is set up for Dec. 5th to discuss and agree on a Subsidy package. She will be calling us before that date with an "offer". Gee, it almost sounds like....buying a car or something. ?? Well whatever it is, it certainly doesn't seem right.

On a brighter note, she asked for our daughters new name and spelling! We've had that picked out for sometime now and have even started calling her by the new name. I don't know why, but telling her that information was sooooooooo exciting!!!!!!! It's almost real now. I think it's been so long since we got word we would be her Adoptive family, that it's just surreal. I hear that once the Adoption is finalized our Hearts will suddenly open completely... and I just can't imagine that! She already feels like our own child. I don't feel any differently toward her than I do my biological children, so I can't imagine a little piece of paper that makes it official is going to do anything different to my heart. We shall see. I did have a strange warm feeling, one that I had not felt before, as I tucked her into bed last night. Perhaps there IS some part that is closed off, protecting itself from hurt and pain that would come if she were to be removed from our family?? I guess only time will tell....

I had the unique experience of previewing a wonderful book called "I Love You More", by Laura Duksta and illustrated by Karen Keesler.

I must tell you what a wonderful story this is!

The book is flip-sided, so it may be read from front to back... or back to front.
(Meaning the book never ends, just as a mother's love for her child never does!)

"Mommy, just how much do you love me?"

"I love you higher than the highest bird ever flew. I love you taller than the tallest tree ever grew."

With bright beautiful illustrations, this book will bring tears to your eyes as you read it. The message it holds is so magical, it will quickly climb to the top of your favorites list.

Author Laura Duksta once said:
"Love is the conversation that erases fear. Since 9/11 the world has become filled with a conversation of hatred, terror, war... fear. It's time us to be responsible for filling the world up with a conversation that will empower us, one of compassion, understanding, wisdom, joy... love."

As a parent of 4 small children, I encourage you to check out I Love You More.
In fact, the message of this book is so wonderful I would recommended it to families of any age. Not just those with young children, it would be a fabulous gift given by Adults to their elderly parents.

This book get's a thumbsup!

I heard a bad word today. It's a nasty evil word, that no one wants to hear...ever.

I'll whisper it, because saying the word aloud stings of pain.... Rejected

Yes, that's right REJECTED (Okay, so yelling it makes me feel a bit better)

For the last 4 years, we've had our fingerprints taken multiple times. I've actually lost count on how many times we've had them done. Never, not even once have we had an issue with our fingerprints.

Of course, being that this was the last time we would have to have fingerprints run in order to finalize our daughter's Adoption...OF COURSE they would be rejected!! (Actually, it was just my prints, something about them being smudged.) The FBI will not accept them and I must resubmit.

Do you know what this means? It means we will ~not~ be finalizing this Adoption in 2007. We're talking about a 2 month delay. Perhaps longer depending on how quickly Denver gets me a new Fingerprint Card, depending on how backed up they are over at the FBI. It took over 2 months for the last set of prints to come back.

I'm honestly trying to decide if it would be worth it to Fly out to Denver and do a digital fingerprint scan there in the Human Services building. The results would be back in 3-5 DAYS. So is it worth a $200 plane ticket?? I'm not quite sure yet....

What do you think?

I finally have some time to sit down and update things.

....she does not have Cystic Fibrosis. Yay!!! We see the Pulminologist again soon for followup. I'm not sure what he's going to do now. All of the medication (for reflux) that he had us try proved worthless. The Dysphagiagram (to check for aspiration of liquids or solids when she eats) again came out normal. It's all wonderful news.... yet she continues to have frequent wheezing episodes. I hope he has a good Plan B. We shall see.

I contacted the caseworker in Denver to find out the status of the Adoption. She emailed me back and said that last time she spoke with her guy (whoever that is!) they were only waiting on our latest fingerprint cards to be returned from the State.

Hmm? That's odd, because I don't remember ever agreeing to a subsidy!? They can't file for a day in court without that being crossed of the agenda list. This is the sweetest caseworker, but sometimes I really do wonder.... because we're not actually *in* Denver (or even in Colorado for that matter) if she pushes our case to the back burner because it's so convenient. I mean, after all she doesn't have monthly home visits to remind her that we're sitting here anxiously awaiting the day our Daughter is OFFICIALLY ours.

I do have some more good news though. As we near the end of yet another year of waiting, my husband and I have begun to get a little nervous. You see,we have not done any of the required annual training hours in order to keep our Foster Care license. The LAST thing we want to do is take all of the initial training (27 hours here in Oklahoma) over again. We have to have a current Foster Care license in order for "The Princess" to remain in our care until her Adoption is finalized. Never in our wildest dreams did we ever imagine it wouldn't be finalized by the end of the year. The way the case is progressing though, now I'm not so sure. We may very well still be waiting come January.

Thinking about the possibility that we may have to scramble together 12 annual credit hours in just a few weeks was a little stressful to say the least.

Well, I got some paperwork in the mail from the Oklahoma caseworker yesterday. It was a report of any training we've done over the year and how many hours were still needed. Much to my surprise, instead of a big fat ZERO, it stated that we had:
27 hours, 2007

Apparently, because we didn't finish last year's class until January of 07 (due to Weather related cancellations of the class, several weeks in a row) they are counting all of those training hours for 07. Technically, I'm not sure they were supposed to do that, but I'm certainly not going to wave my arms around pointing it out to them. No way Jose. What a relief that is!


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