** I'm making some changes, so please ignore the mess. Thanks!**


We're slowly moving along. I'll share with you what we've been working on so far.

Every day, we each need to have "Special Time" with the Princess.(I'm going to call it ST)

We must set out 2 interactive toys (such as Blocks, Coloring, Playdoh etc) at the table. We tell her: "We're going to have Special Time. You can play anything on the table and I will play with you."

Sounds simple enough right? Well, surprisingly it's not as easy as it sounds!!

During ST we must avoid...

Giving Commands

For example: "Will you hand me that paper?" or "Look at this!"
Those kind of commands are so innocent sounding and things that we all often say while playing with our children. It's TOUGH to not say them.

Asking Questions

For example: "What color is this crayon?" or "Do you want to play blocks?"
See what I mean!?!? It's hard not to ask questions while playing with your child.

Avoid Criticism

For example: "Don't scribble on your paper" or "I don't like it when you talk back"
Now this one is easier than the others, but it's also hard when the Princess doesn't want to sit at the table with me and play. When she wants to throw the toys on the floor (or across the room) and scream it's REAL HARD to ignore the behavior and stay positive!

Okay, by now you're probably asking what we CAN do right?? Well, I'm getting there! lol

We must do these things while playing with the Princess during ST:


PRAISE appropriate behavior. For example: "I like the way you're playing quietly"

REFLECT appropriate talk.
Child: "I made a star"
Parent: "Yes, you made a star"

IMITATE behavior and speech.
Child: "I'm drawing a circle"
Parent: "I'll draw one too"

DESCRIBE appropriate behavior. For example: "You're making a tower!"

Always use ENTHUSIASM. Voice is playful with lots of inflection

We must avoid the words NO, NOT, STOP, QUIT and DON'T
So, everyday for just 5 minutes we have to practice ST. Once a week we go to the Child Study Center and meet with the PCIT Team. They take us (one at a time) and put us in a playroom with the Princess. With a bug in our ear, they are sitting behind a one way mirror observing us. (It's quite creepy if you ask me!!!) If you accidentally do or say something you're not supposed to, they let you know! They also give you specific things to say to the child.

My first experience in the observation room was kind of.... well QUIET. There's just so much you CAN'T say, I couldn't think of any of the things we were SUPPOSED to say. lol Thankfully the team realized I was struggling and kind of pushed me along by telling me what to say and when to say it. Gosh I felt like such a dork.

It's very interesting. I'm curious to see where this leads us and what the NEXT step is.

Article on PCIT

4 messages:

  1. Michelle said...


    You are such an awesome mom I somehow doubt that you have any problems with these. You are so proactive. :)

    I am really happy that I met you in Chicago!

    {{{HUGE HUGS}}} Just because I am not sure IF you need them, but just in case you do!

    Hang in there!

  2. M said...

    Wow, that's really interesting. Keep us updated on how it is going.  

  3. ~Momma Chaos said...

    Wow, that does seem kinda hard! Lol! I mean geesh all those things are stuff that you do on a normal basis when you play with your kids.. Don't feel bad, I'm sure I would have been the exact same way sitting there saying nothing afraid to say the wrong thing and not knowing what in the world I COULD say.. lol! Keep us updated on how it goes! It sounds very interesting!  

  4. Kids Special Needs said...

    yep, it's hard and feels contrived. But it should get better. When we did this with our little girl, we saw that she loved special play time, but the whole philosophy just wasn't enough for her. She has too many mental/medical/developmental delay problems and issues for this to sink in with her. The whole pcit thing, that is. Our teacher warned us of that from the beginning. She told us for example, if a child is autistic, this program will not work. Same too for children with severe impairment/brain damage, etc.

    Sounds like it will work well for you guys though!!

    Good luck on the orthodonture! We too are flaberghasted at the costs. YIKES! And my husband wants braces after the kids. I think we'll be going to the orthodontist for 18 years..............  


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